A Deceptive Abortion Experience

Emily Letts’ video of her “positive abortion experience” has gone viral. You can read about it here. What she may perceive as being positive, is in fact a potent example of the deceived putting forth darkness as light and deceiving others.

I have written half of a novel with the goal of shining a light on exactly this type of thinking. For various reasons I have set it aside for awhile, but this event has renewed my zeal to get back at it again. Emily Letts’ words reminded me so much of the following portion of my book, and so I have decided to share it, with hopes that this blatant deception might open eyes to the demonic and idolatrous beliefs that help fuel abortion mills.

A Deceptive Abortion Experience

The office greeted her with a warm blast of air and as she shed her winter coat a young, pretty receptionist offered a kind smile. Anna looked around the waiting area. A young girl with her mother and a solo middle aged woman with frizzy bleached hair sat silently. Neither looked visibly pregnant and for some reason that relieved her slightly. No one made eye contact. She fought a sense of shame at being there- not so much because she believed her plan was wrong, but because she felt like it was beneath her. This wasn’t something that should happen to an upstanding, moral person, of good family upbringing like herself. Something about being there made her feel cheapened.

After registering and taking a clipboard full of papers to fill out from the smiling receptionist, Anna took a seat. She filled in everything but the waiver, which she’d been instructed to wait and sign with the counsellor prior to the procedure. As she waited, her eyes wandered to a painting which took up an entire wall of the office. On a bright backdrop of purple, was the figure of a woman who appeared to be coming up out of a winding maze. Paused in the midst of dancing, her hair spun around her and her arms flew freely over her head.

Anna noticed a stack of pamphlets on the magazine table with that painting on the front and discreetly picked one up. Anna had always looked back on that moment with gratitude, considering it a defining moment in her life as she read the words:

“Every woman is a beautiful and unique child of the Universe, intertwined mysteriously with the divine. You have been endowed with grace, blessed with kindness, and granted the power to live, to love, and to choose your own path. “For Women’s Health” has had this picture painted on our wall in hopes that you can see yourself in this woman. No matter how winding or how many dead ends your path has been filled with, you alone have the power to free yourself. No one and no circumstance can stop you if you choose to embrace the powerful woman that you are. You have come here because you alone know what is best for you. As women, we reach out to those around us with tenderness and grace. Have you considered treating yourself with the same mind and the same acceptance? Today is yet another day to find empowerment within. Perhaps the choice to come here today was a hard one. We applaud your courage. Be kind to yourself and set your dreams before you. You alone are the author of your life. Live freely, move forward, and find that place where you can dance without reserve.”

Anna looked back at the picture on the wall and for a moment felt enveloped by it. Her mind buzzed, and her stomach rose into her beating chest. A distant alarm was going off inside, warning her to set aside this way of thinking, warning her that something wasn’t right. But as she considered the image and the words with an open and needy heart, the warning sound became muffled. In its’ place a seed of power was planted that day, a seed that had blossomed within over the years as she continued to tap into her own great potential, her endless reservoir of strength.

When the counsellor called her name she had purposefully shed any sense of humiliation or feelings of cheapness. She had set her mind to focus on the strength of her decision and the bright future that lay ahead of her, instead of on the task at hand. She remembered the counsellor asking “Do you know how far along you are?”

“Around 7 weeks,” Anna responded, as the counsellor’s face registered the data with approval. Anna was glad she hadn’t hesitated any longer on the decision. She could have come sooner, but had let the inner battle about telling Mike rage a little longer then she should have. Still, it was early enough to soothe her conscience and to reckon herself a responsible woman. At this point she likened the procedure to that of removing a basic, undeveloped plant seed in the ground, and that was as far as she allowed her thoughts regarding the pregnancy go. She erected a mental ironclad wall around any further consideration.

Anna had wondered if the counsellor would discuss different options like adoption or carrying to full term, but had been relieved by the women’s silence on those topics. Anna had made an appointment for an abortion- it really wasn’t their business to pry but to provide. She asked whether Anna was certain of her decision, and whether or not she had emotional support. The woman seemed pleased with Anna’s affirmative responses and didn’t linger. Though the woman came across more like a structured professional than a wishy-washy counsellor, Anna remembered that she had generated warmth and acceptance. She had echoed the pamphlet saying “I’m pleased to see how readily you are accepting your choice. You are the only one who knows what is right for you and for your body.” Anna had been uncertain how to respond- surely a smile at such a time seemed out of place, so she had simply nodded in agreement.

The counsellor quickly went over the procedure- Vacuum Aspiration. The harsh title made her tense up, but the woman quickly eased her fears explaining how by gentle suction the pregnancy would be removed. Her status would change from pregnant to not pregnant in a matter of moments- it was as easy as that. Once she understood the minimal risks involved with the procedure, Anna signed the waver.

The doctor had been bustling back and forth around the office, and at this point he came to get her. She was accompanied by the counsellor into a different room where some blood tests and an ultra sound were performed. The monitor was turned well away from Anna, and as the cold instrument prodded and searched her stomach, she struggled against imagining what they could be viewing. She had never seen an ultra sound of a blob of tissue before, and it was difficult to envision anything other than a tiny baby. She did her best.

After the examination she undressed herself and was positioned on the medical bed. Everything looked and felt cold, sterile. Her calm composure verged on splitting as the doctor strapped her feet in stirrups. Maybe Mike should have come after all. She was grateful to have requested sedation. The doctor was talking but her mind was distracted, reeling for control over the situation. Everything was happening too fast, and for a moment she wished everyone would stop talking and be still. Why was she doing this again? She reminded herself that this was her body, her choice, and a necessary step towards her future. She visualized the woman dancing freely, hands held high. A nurse was strapping her wrists down and hooking up an IV. “Are you ok?” she asked.

“Yes,” Anna replied, with that ever ready, confident under pressure smile she was known for. She bore it flawlessly, no hint of panic, but she felt every muscle in her body tense. The nurse grew blurry as she heard a voice tell her to count down from five. With the vision of the dancing woman frozen in mid air, she disappeared into a calm black while the world outside her shook and jerked in some crazed fast forward motion she was happy to forget.

Anna remembered awakening to a strange sense of vacancy as her hand flew to her stomach. The nurse nearby was filling out some paperwork. What had she felt in that first few minutes of awakening? Disoriented for certain. Some minor cramping and alarm as she saw how much she was bleeding. For a few seconds she felt… sad. After the staff checked her and coached her through some post abortion precautions, she sat waiting for Mike to return and stared at the painting on the wall. As she contemplated her self-worth, her journey this far, accomplishments past and those to come, she knew this would be a defining moment. Either regret would stunt herself and her relationship with Mike, or she would embrace this as a positive and brave step in her life. She would love herself instead of punish herself. She closed her eyes and for a moment felt relief. I’m free, she had thought and her courage grew. When she left the clinic she left the procedure there with it, and took instead a new sense of empowerment.

Mike studied her face before they pulled off. “How are you?” he asked with concern.

“You know what Mike?” she had said. “I’m alright. I’m alright, and I’m not going to feel sorry for that. We’ve done what we had to do and we’re going to leave it here. We’re going to move on. Move forward.” She looked at him; His face was still, his eyes averted.

He looked up at her and hesitantly reached for her hand. “Moving forward,” he repeated with a small uncertain smile as he started the car. And so they had. She had successfully left it in the past- until now.

Concluding Thoughts

We’re killing babies- and we know it. And frightfully- we’re celebrating it. How much more  deceived could we be or wicked can we get? Do you realize that God’s patience is waiting, as “when God’s patience waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was being prepared, in which a few, that is eight persons, were brought safely through water (1 Peter 3:20)”?

“For as in those days before the flood they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day when Noah entered the ark, and they were unaware until the flood came and swept them all away, so will be the coming of the Son of Man (Matthew 24:38-39).”

We don’t know how much longer God’s patience is going to wait. But a day of judgement is coming- the Son of Man is coming, and He will judge the world in righteousness. Have you fled from the wrath to come? He will not only punish extraordinary evil, but all liars, all thieves, all blasphemers, all sexually immoral, all who have lived for self as was right in their own eyes. That includes you, and that includes me.

Unless you flee to Jesus Christ, that saving refuge from the storm of wrath to come. In love, He died the death we deserved and was punished in our place. He rose from the dead and conquered the grave- He will give eternal life to whomever would confess their sin, trusting that only by His blood can you be washed clean, and turn to live for Him.

Hebrews 9:27-28 “And just as it is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment, so Christ, having been offered once to bear the sins of many, will appear a second time, not to deal with sin but to save those who are eagerly waiting for Him.”

Hebrews 2:3 “How shall we escape if we neglect such a great salvation?”

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