Tag Archives: treasure

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Confidence in the Face of Fear

I’m going to be straight up with you- it’s been rough lately. I’ve had this weird cough that comes out at night for weeks, and a muscle spasm in my back for a week straight which isn’t loving the cough, and among all this I’m trying to process and go through the rigors of figuring out what is going on with this tumor I’ve been diagnosed with.

But the regular daily routines continue, and I’m keeping up with them as best I can. Laundry. Dishes. Groceries. Diapers. Children to chase and keep occupied. I am incredibly blessed to have a husband who works from home full time and has prepared 90% of all lunches and dinners for the past- how many years? I don’t know, but he’s a gem, that is for sure.

Almost strangely, by the grace of God I’m sure, I have been ok for the most part. I’m taking one day, one task at a time, and trying to enjoy what I can in this life, as much as I can. Mostly these days, I’m enjoying watching my tiny person start to explore her world, and interact with it. I mean- there was that moment today when I took my eyes off her for 30 seconds and she got into the garbage can, started eating a banana peel, and I kind of lost it, but overall, she is just this tiny little package of contagious joy.

I just love my kids. They make my head spin sometimes and I am crazy tired at the end of the day, but there is nothing I would rather be doing.

I recently shared an article “Worrying About Your Future,” and by the grace of God I have actually stomped my foot down on occasion and said “No. That’s it. Not going there,” put the worries about my future behind me and carried on with my day. I like that groove. It’s working for me. I don’t like to think about things I have no control over. For example, when I had a scheduled C-section last year, I prepared by not reading a single article about C-sections. If there were potential complications, I preferred to remain in the dark, because what could I do about them anyway? But when they brought me into that bright and surprisingly busy room, it suddenly hit me: I have no idea what is happening here. What on earth was I thinking?

I met with the surgeon this week who might be doing my surgery, or might not be. This surgery seems to be more complicated than I would have hoped, and it sounds like she will be involving more people in the matter. There were many more maybes in this appointment than I would like. So many potential things that “might” result, or treatments that they “might” try, or methods that they “might” use to “maybe have to” reconstruct my stomach. Just so many maybes. And I’m supposed to do my research on these maybes, I suppose, so that I’m not surprised by them. Continue reading

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Still: A Poem For Christians Awaiting Perfection

Learned, but have I really learned
To trust?
Hoped in God, yet other times
In dust.
Treasures high, but also some
That rust.
Desired God; not always,
But I must.

Hungry, thirsty, satisfied
And filled,
Yet other times all empty
Wanting, nil.
Reaching for His word I must
Be still,
It’s there dry bones ignite to
Do His will.

Overcame, but still more fears
To find,
Surrendered all, I thought, but
Still blind
To fortresses tall standing
In my mind.

Arrived- not ever, not yet
Perfected- not close, but press
Onward- to where salvation lies
Forward- straining for the prize
Upward- rising to His throne
Why? For Christ made me His own. Continue reading

Roots

A Resting Place for Hope

I suppose you could consider this poem a modern take on the book of Ecclesiastes. It is not all based on my life, but in some sense it is the story of every person. We all strive for satisfaction, and all of us have placed hope in things that fail to provide it. There is only one place where hope can rest secure and sure- One living hope that endures forever.

A Resting Place for Hope

I thought to put my hope in friends
To mold and shape me by their trends
In their acceptance I would glow
And on their shoulders place my woes;
As long as they were by my side
I could survive life’s bumpy ride.

But friends, so sad to see
Did not revolve ’round me
Fair weather types abound
Rare shoulder to be found. Continue reading

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Identity

Perhaps today, more than ever, we revolve ourselves around our own identity. Social media makes it easier, and more public than ever, to almost develop a “brand” for ourselves. We shoot messages and photographs through the air, building up an image for ourselves, trying to display that we are a person worth knowing, or even admiring. We want to believe and to display that we have worthy thoughts, worthy talents, worthy goals, worthy jobs, worthy parenting, worthy marriages, and the list goes on. It seems we are in a race to impress- though isn’t it true that flattery pleases for mere seconds? If we live for the praises of men we will return to the treadmill for praise in a rush- rarely satisfied, barely catching a breath. Continue reading

The Parable of the Rich Fool and More

May the very words of Christ change us.

Luke 12:13-21 “Someone in the crowd said to him (Jesus), ‘Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.”  But he said to him, ‘Man, who made me a judge or arbitrator over you?’  And he said to them, ‘Take care, and be on your gaurd against all covetousness, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.’  And he told them a parable saying, ‘The land of a rich man produced plentifully, and he thought to himself, ‘What shall I do, for I have nowhere to store my crops?’  And he said, ‘I will do this:  I will tear down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods.  And I will say to my soul, Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.’  But God said to him, ‘Fool!  This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?’  So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God.”

Continue reading